you can never go home again...

Jason and I were sitting tonight at the Friendly's on the Pike and Rt. 15 waiting for our ice cream sundaes. I had ordered my usual, as I am a creature of painful habit, while he waited on the mint chocolate chip concoction that ALMOST got me to change my mind about the reese's peanut butter cup sundae. It was about 10:30, which in central Pennsylvania is very late.

Me: I just realized I can never move back here.
Jason: Why not?
Me: I dunno...
Jason: The people? The atmosphere? The fact that 10:30pm here is equivalent to 3:30am in Philly?
Me: All that and more.

I spent an earlier portion of the night getting drenched at the Homecoming football game at my alma mater, East Pennsboro. I don't remember anything about the game, but just attempting not to get too wet, something at which I failed. When the game was suspended until further notice (it later resumed...in the pouring rain...), I fled with my mother and our friend Kim to the awning in front of the high school, which is something every other middle and high school student without transportation. I haven't heard foul language like that...ever. Even out of the kids I pass on the subway. They were also wet, which my mother observed makes them all the more threatening. After a while, we joined my father and our friend Randy in a sports storage building that the school officials had opened up to shelter the cheerleaders, the homecoming court, and their irate parents. I saw one of my former teachers and I went up and had a chat.

Teacher: So, how is school going?
Me: Pretty well. I'm getting ready to apply to grad schools now.
Teacher: Goodness, that makes me feel old. What do you plan on getting your Master's degree in?
Me: American Civilization or American Studies. I'm hoping to study at either Brown or William & Mary.
Teacher: Why do you want to get your Masters?
Me: Well, I'm hoping to teach at the college level.
Teacher: You're very bright...why don't you just teach high school and forget grad school?
Me: Really?
Teacher: Yes. I'm sure East Penn would love to have someone like you back here.
Me: That's nice.

Just being back at home today makes me realize how much I have grown past this town. I am just too ambitious to live here. No one expects anything more of you than average. It's very frustrating and I could see me falling into a hypothetical hole of despair and loathing. Also, very few of my friends are here. Jason is both places, but even he seems happier in Philly. My plan is to cloister myself away on Delwood Drive and do work and avoid the lameness that is central Pennsylvania. All the bullshit and undeserved confidence the people here possess is starting to make me ill.

Angsty message...over.

I'm peachy!

are you there God?

It's me...Megan?

Today at work I was given proof that there is a God and that he probably thinks I'm OK. First, I finished my close reading for Tuesday in record time. Second, I was nominated for Homecoming Queen (very exciting for me, as I was never nominated for anything like that in high school). Third, I got 2 emails saying that 2 of my three classes on Tuesday are cancelled. Fourth, the 2 big things I'm working on right now are for those classes and they are now not due until the 4th.

Life suddenly got amazing...well...more amazing than before. This week is not going to suck. I feel it. everything is literally falling into place. My friday is going to be extremely relaxing, as I am having afternoon tea at 2 and going on a date with Jason later that night. My parents are coming up on Saturday for parents weekend and for the Improv show, which a lot of my friends who have graduated are coming to as well.

Life is wonderful.

I'm peachy.