the art of woo...ing. Part 2

The response to "The Art of Woo...ing" was overwhelming. Boys and girls alike responded (positively, I may add) to the entry (there were 9 total comments!) and I just wanted to expand on the topic further. First off, I'll give testimonials from the people who commented. I'll keep them anonymous, except for gender.

Anon. Male #1: "I usually got "What the fuck are you doing?" as a reply for being chivalrous... what would that constitute as?"

Well, that would constitute as a girl who is not worth your time. If the fuck was omitted, it might be a girl who simply cannot recognize wooing and another method of woo must be embarked upon. Perhaps something more subtle and not in public. Most wooing attempts are first made in public situations, such as parties, lunch rooms, and theatres (in this case). Girls are very much on their guard in these places from real assholes and generally treat every straight man as if they are the scum of the Earth to keep their guard up. It's nothing personal, generally, but just a protection mechanism. At least, that's my personal experience.

Anon. Male #2: "I'm chivalrous and gallant because it allows me to be painfully shy, which I usually am in those situations."

Ladies, take careful note to #2. A man who is shy is not necessarily disinterested, but respecting your boundries. They are good listeners. Great listeners, in fact. These guys have more classic ideas of romance and relationships, generally, so if you are that girl, they will sense that in you and you should definitly consider relationships on friend or romantic level with these fellows.

Anon. Male #3: "Wouldn't all of us guys like to believe that works, and that all you girls out there follow that. I've been trying chivalry and the whole nice without return thing for a long time."

Patience! If you want to find "that girl", it's not going to just happen. No one likes to be patient, but in romance, it's necessary. Rhett Butler spent years wooing Scarlett O'Hara just to find out that she was a frigid bitch. And he's Rhett Butler / Clark Gable! Something worth as much as true love doesn't happen over night, nor would you want it to. You want to have the stories to remind you what attracted you to a person other than "I had really good alcohol that night and she was wearing a halter". Not that the guys who read this feel that way anyway. Christ, I'm preaching to the choir. In short, be patient.

Anon. Male #4: "Wooing is pretty much the only way I fly, but it rarely works. I think it worked once for me and that was an excellent time. But now that the world of women is stagnant for me, especially in the wooing sense, I will not waste my time wooing. I won't get a girl drunk either. More or less, women are dead to me right now. I try too hard and get no results."

Statements like this are disheartening to me. First, it indicates that chivilary is not dead. He has tried so hard at this point that he has given up for the time being! Second, it reminds me that many modern ladies don't respond to the woo. It's hard to recognize, I'll admit. I'm sure I've completely overlooked wooing attempts, and to that I apologize. The interest does have to be mutual, but girls aren't giving these nice boys a chance. Instead, they're off with the guy who will take them to the party, but make them pay for themselves. Ladies, if a guy asks you to go somewhere with him specifically, he should be prepared to pay. If it's a group thing and you are not established as a couple, then pay for yourself. Don't be a gold digger. Kanye will not be pleased. Fellows, have hope in the females. There are a lot of us out there that DO respond to the woo.

Anon. Male #5: "Sadly, it doesn't always work, but hey, I enjoy trying and well, I'm sure all those nice guys out there will keep on wooing. So to all the guys out there, keep wooing, and to those girls who are being wooed, OPEN YOUR EYES and let us woo you. And for all you single girls out there, you will be wooed, every one of you, so just keep your eyes open and wait for us."

This is the anti-thesis of number 4. He is younger and has renewed hope in the female race. He also tries to reassure the nice girls waiting by the phone that they will get to be wooed. This comment needs no further explanation; it's pretty clear.

For a change of opinion:
Anon. Female: "I agree with the wooing suggestions. To all those guys who woo, great, keep on doing it. If it hasn't worked in the past, well, sorry like the blog says, the girl you are wooing is just a doo-doo head, or perhaps it just wasn't meant to be. But when you find a girl that is not a doo-doo head, or find a situation that is "meant to be" (if you believe in that kinda stuff) she will love you even more for it, I promise."

She's right, you know. She does also distinguish between the nice girls and the girls who aren't worth your time, as well as the fact that it may simply not be "meant to be". Yes, this does suck when the girl you've been watching while your heart beats harder and harder simply isn't interested. Even if she is not interested, but still a nice girl, she will thank you regardless. If she is just a doo-doo head (don't we love this scientific terminology?), you'll know. That's also what your friends are for. They'll notice, even if you don't.

I don't think that there is anything else to say for now, other than I'm interested to see what this next semester holds with all these girls waiting to be wooed and guys actually trying to woo them. Guys, think Fitzgerald. Classy, quiet, tactful. Girls, look for the like. I'm interested to see what methods of woo are discovered by the men of my blog.

I'm peachy.